In love?

Aye, Jack Sparrow!

Lol, watching Pirates of the Carribbean; At Worlds End. I remember one year for halloween I dressed as Will Turner and my bff was Jack Sparrow...Oh good times.

Buuuut anyways.

I am currently working on something for him at the moment. I realize not knowing when I will see him again is almost painful. But I know I WILL see him again, so it's not so bad. And the others too, I need to see them. Just to hear them first hand might be enough...Might. No, no I need to see him. More then that, I must feel him again. I've been craving his hug ever since the moment I last felt it.

I was talking to my brother last night about relationships, age difference, and love. And well, the age difference crap he wouldn't say anything about that wasn't absolute negativity. But he was talking about how people think they are in love all the time, and don't realize that they aren't. He said "When you are really truly in love you will know it. And every other time you thought you were would stand out so obvious that you think you're crazy for every having thought you were before. But when it's real, for real, you're going to know it." And so I thought about them. I've determined I love him. But am I in love? I don't want to say yes and I don't want to say no. First of all, how could I be? Honestly. Don't know him well enough, and only met him once. But it just feels so right. How can it not be? Jeeze. I don't know. But if I was in love, wouldn't I know? Wouldn't I know it without having to think about it? I think so. But I don't want to claim my feelings to be more then they are...And I don't want to claim them to be what they are, if that is what they are.

So I realize that I can't figure this out now. I need more to go on. I need to see him again, I need to feel him again before I can say with complete confidence "I am in love with him." or I can say "I love him, but that is it." I want to know. But when I think too much I lose reason and when I feel and only feel, I can't be certain. What I feel is strong, but....Is it that strong? I just...I don't know.

I should be afraid to love again. But I'm so thrilled to be feeling the way I do. I wonder how I haven't loved this man all my life.

Tonights blog = Short blog. Probably shortest blog since my very first post, because I haven't got much to talk about now and I've got plenty to do.

"Do you trust me enough, if we become two rebels?" - Two Rebels by Honor Society.

Sigh.

-Brianna